Jealousy and envy are not the right words but I'm not sure there is a single word in the English language that would properly convey my feelings about artists who follow their passion. Painters, sculptors, singers writers who make their lives creating something. How does that idea pop in their head and come to life? I really could never understand it and desperately wanted to. I really can't draw, write, sing ect.... I just didn't understand as I considered myself "without an artistic bone in my body"
I have been sewing all of my adult life which is a form of artistry but not something I really saw as a form of creative expression. Sure I was making things that were beautiful but nothing I could say was my own. I was using patterns and working from there. Then along came my niece and nephew who were a blessing to me in so very many ways!
I wanted to make them things that were special so I started creating patterns on my own. Then I saw the cutest baby shoes, wool felt and needle felting. I had to learn how, create my own, then couldn't stop. So many ideas kept popping in my head that I had to get out of bed and bring them to life!!!! It just wouldn't stop and I couldn't be happier! One day while I was working my husband of 20+ years learned over and said "Huh, I never considered you and artist but wow you really are" was possibly one of the best things he's ever said to me.
I continue to allow myself to explore and try new things. I explore and understand the feeling that comes with something small catching your eye and feeling inspired. Wishing I didn't have to sleep so I can create the concept in my head. It's truly a dream come true that I can say "I'm an artist"